Friday, June 20, 2008

Emotional Eating: Creating Enduring Change

I’ve spent a lot of time in airports lately. That means that I’ve spent a lot of time at the news stand, scanning the covers of magazines, looking for some nice relaxing reading material. In my browsing, I’ve been struck by how magazine articles emphasize making changes or starting something new.

“Get in bikini shape,” "The diet that works," “Exercise programs for 6-pack abs.” You know what I’m talking about--headlines with big sparkly promises that aim to excite us about undertaking a new project.

Given the appropriate level of enthusiasm, most of us are able to get motivated to start something new. It’s fresh territory, a clean slate, a new approach.

Here’s what the magazines don’t talk about: successful change doesn’t happen with just a bright shiny new program. The right program is only one tool. Enduring change requires stamina. Changes that last require us to pace ourselves. It’s not just STARTING the exciting new project; it’s continuing to slog ahead when the going gets tough and when the excitement wanes.

With emotional eating, stamina means having the courage to stop and ask ourselves why we are reaching for the Doritos, even on the days when we’re not sure we really want to know the answer. Enduring change requires starting the project or the program, riding the wave of any honeymoon phase we are lucky enough to experience, and then recognizing that the biggest payoff comes when the easy part stops and we start feeling stuck.

It’s really true. When you hit that spot where you feel like “here we go again, this is where it all falls apart,” and you stick with it, you keep slogging ahead, you put your head down and you keep taking small steps forward--THAT’S where the big payoff happens.

It's hard. Many people can’t do this alone. We have too many inner critics--powerful inner perfectionists, who talk us into sabotage and failure. This is the place where you can pay off big if you call a friend or a role model. This is one of the biggest benefits of hiring a coach. It can take courage to state that the change you are trying to make is important enough to reach out for help, but investing in yourself and investing in moving forward is a powerful step. The experience of learning how to bypass those internal critics and those old stumbling blocks is priceless.

As enticing as the magazine headlines are, many times we don’t need to start over. What we need is the encouragement and the accountability and the support and the reminders to KEEP GOING. We need that voice in our ear reminding ourselves that we really truly are getting somewhere. Small steps, moving forward--that's what pays off.

Take good care,

Melissa

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